Have you ever had those days where the words are whispering in the back of your mind, but no matter how much you try you can’t figure out how to get them on paper?
I’m talking about when the scene won’t work no matter how much you bang your head against your keyboard. I came across this pin on my Pinterest:
How about when you can’t connect the words together to make a sentence that make sense? Or better yet writing dialogue that doesn’t sound forced or stilted?
Ugh, I’m not in my happy place. Can you tell?
Damn, muse…she can be such a capricious bitch.
And now to the next step. The final read through before sending it to the publisher for publication. Once I hit send, there’s no going back.
“Dear God, please let everything be okay…”
No such luck. I found errors I swear hadn’t been there before. Missing words, stuff switched around in a sentence, sections that made me question WTH was I thinking.
At this point, Goblins are dancing around my head. Pointing and prodding at my every insecurity, their shrieks and maniacal laughter taunting me at every turn.
It’s devastating because I had my book professional edited, multiple times. But, like my publisher said everyone is human and mistakes happen. How many times have you read a book from a well-known author and caught an error? Things can get past even the most discerning eye.
Breathe, Monica, breathe. Wuuu Saaaa.
Thankfully, I’m able to list everything I found and send it to the person who formatted my book. She can submit the corrections and everything will be right in the universe once again.
I keep trying to remind myself to stay positive and focused. Don’t let my fears overwhelm my world.
Honestly, though at times like this it’s easier said than done.
Well, things are getting real. I know I’ve said it before, but now I’m talking to my publisher about release dates and pricing. And it’s awesome!
Of course, I’m a bit of an emotional basket case. I’m not going to lie, I’ve considered following in the footsteps of some of the literary greats and taking up alcoholism because I’m losing my mind (JK, I can’t handle the hangovers, I’m a sissy.)
Sylvia Plath quote
But, seriously anxiety attacks and mood swings have been part of my daily action plan whether I want it added to the list or not. Exercise, yoga poses, and stress eating haven’t helped at all. So I do what every other red-blooded, gung-ho driven writer does in a situation such as this, I ignore it all and keep pushing forward.
I’m researching book blog tours, purchasing marketing materials, and utilizing social media for blatant self-promotion like I learned in PR101. Do I think it’s enough to garner enough attention to generate a solid following of dedicated fans and boost sales?
I don’t know. I hope so.
Here’s what I do know, I’m releasing my book in the next couple of weeks and I’m freaking out!!!
How Does One Become a Butterfly?
I’ve deleted and rewritten this blog more times than I can count today. It’s kind of ridiculous. I was going to be deep and thought provoking about writers making their own opportunities but I decided to ditch that idea. I feel like I’m beating the same rug over and over again.
As I’m starting over (AGAIN), I’m watching my dog play fight with her metal bowl. My goofy dog finds happiness in the simple things. Ginger is tossing around her bowl and growling at it. I’m not sure who’s winning, her or the bowl.
After a few moments of watching my dog find such enjoyment in something so simple, I decided to take a page out of the book of Ginger. I read a quote this week from Jonathan Winters “If your ship doesn’t come in, swim out to it.”
I think that sums up everything quite nicely, don’t you?